Naked Massage - To Cover With a Towel Or Not? (Revised 2008)

Chair Covers - Naked Massage - To Cover With a Towel Or Not? (Revised 2008)

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Nakedness and what it evokes is a real issue for bodywork therapists, especially female therapists because of how some clients, men or women, will use the massage session to display sexual behavior.

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For this narrative we are not dealing with how bodywork therapists and massage persons can endeavor sexuality with their clients, but only about clients displaying sexuality while the session.

I speak as a previous Licensed Marriage, family and Child Relationships advisor in the State of California, Usa. I have done bodywork myself as part of the therapy I do. I have had many years of bodywork done with me, as well as a number of training courses in bodywork therapy.

I speak from counseling massage therapists in my own practice. I also am familiar with psychotherapy for sexual uses, together with therapeutic sexual massage that is effective.

Sexual massage is more practiced covering the United States than in the States because of severe sexuality issues and attitudes in the United States differing from Canada and Europe.

Here is a sexual issue example:

A man asks the woman massage therapist over the phone: do you consist of the genitals in your massage work? This is rather direct. The presenting qoute may be more, do you work with sexual problems as part of your massage work?

How is a male or female massage therapist to respond? Is this a sexual come-on? Or is this a cry for help?

A massage therapist comfortable with their own sexuality may be willing to take on a client who does have sexual problems. Many females are upset that they cannot orgasm. Males may actually get erections, but while in a woman be unable to orgasm.

It would be unusual actually if at least half the people who come in for massage rehabilitation do not have sexual problems. What is the massage body-worker to do?

Some forms of massage do consist of massaging the naked body of the client, with a towel over the pelvic region or not. Other forms work with light clothing on and consist more of stretching movements.

Rolfing works with the naked body so as to see the alignment. There is hardly a opportunity in this form to feel delight responses because Rolfing itself is to break up muscles and facia that have been emotionally tense for years, and so the work can be extremely painful.

It is rare that a male client will directly assault a female massage therapist, but it is still determined good custom not to give massage to persons you do not know fairly well in places where you have no protection should you need to call for help.

Warning - It is the generally appropriate custom to never work alone with a massage client in a building alone. All the time work were there is someone who knows you within calling distance. Work where your live-in partner is at home next room over, or in a building with other therapists or businesses.

Once I did a screaming session with a member of a therapy group in a new place and the motor car salesmen and owner from downstairs came running up and loudly banged on the door. They view someone was being murdered. We had not told them yet that we did therapy with people!

Of policy a male client may not tell you he has sexual problems on the phone, but just come in and then tell you.

Issue Example - The Man Who candidly Orgasmed

- Was this on purpose? And how should the therapist cope it?

One female massage therapist reported to me about a male client who would get an erection every time and have spontaneous orgasm. She never touched his genitals. She had to have a box of tissues around so that he could clean himself up. This was Essalen massage combined with Shiatsu pressure-point massage, which deals especially with freeing blocks in the body.

The male client did not try to have sex with her or get her to touch his genitals. Was this a genuine case of being too orgasmic? What would be the best treatment?

I advised her to instruct her male client to custom full-body awareness as he was being massaged.

Indeed, a chief value for whatever being massaged in many dissimilar styles of massage is to relax totally into sensual, corporeal awareness. Some fall asleep while this relaxation, which is not necessarily healing for the client but acceptable.

For this male client orgasming he was either impressed with his potential to orgasm candidly without touching himself, and needed a female to inspect this, or he was actually a seducer. However, what if he naturally was by nature a spontaneous orgasm type male?

Let's deal with seducers first!

Men who fixate on being seducers are only interested in getting a female so open to them straight through their ways of seduction that they do follow with having intercourse with her.

Thus some men have industrialized a seduction technique and try to make it work to perfection on female massage therapists. They are not interested in an ongoing life relationship. They want only seduction and conquest and are willing to pay the massage fees to set up these kinds of situations.

To my knowledge with the female massage therapists I have known, they were never trained straight through role-playing in how to cope seductive clients.

The massage therapist should keep a massage session All the time on a professional level with a client, not just for reality reasons of keeping one's license to practice, but to keep the massage situation objective and therapeutic.

With the man who candidly orgasmed while his body was being massaged he was emotionally and physically too focused on his erect penis and its potential to display and spray sperm.

So what, we might say. The therapist has to accept many peculiarities with clients, either it is a massage session or not.

I also counseled the massage therapist to take the first five or ten minutes to talk objectively about the client and his behavior. How does it feel to orgasm here? Are you manufacture it happen? Is it spontaneous? What happens with your own lovers?

These easy questions make the client an object of treatment. They de-potentiate the session of its inherent sexuality. The female therapist asserts her professional role as a helper and not a partner. Things are kept within structure. The client is made to feel responsible for his own behavior.

In this real-life example, when my friend, the massage person, made the massage sessions objective as suggested, the man stopped coming. The object to seduce the therapist was no longer possible.

Of course, unconsciously, some do get fixated on seducing mother or father substitutes as a way of 'getting back, getting even,' an unconscious power-play that makes the seducer feel dominant in self-esteem, either truly so or not.

Issue - Example - The Man Who candidly Orgasmed while Massage Who Was Not A professional Seducer

The first edition of this narrative has in its first year been tremendously popular, and as author I have wondered why. Could it be that there are adequate men and some women out there who do candidly orgasm while receiving a massage? One involved man about the first edition of this narrative view it implied that someone who candidly orgasmed was a seducer.

I thank him for giving his concern and I revise this narrative here to make it clear that for those who candidly orgasm, male or female, It May Be A public Problem, But It Is Not Wrong, Nor Even A Sexual Problem. Nor Should You Be determined A Sexual Seducer Or Pervert.

Sorry for the implications I made in my traditional article. And many thanks to the reader who voiced his concern with me.

I would recommend that all massage body-workers have paper tissues, or even clean hand towels available, if a male or female candidly orgasms. Approach such a situation with definite feeling, acceptance and awareness.

"Oh, it looks like you have had a spontaneous orgasm. Don't worry about it here. Massage is meant as relaxing, and sometimes this happens, and can happen with most anyone. Would you prefer paper tissue or a hand towel to clean yourself up."

"I feel ashamed to do it in front of you. It just happens . . ."

"We can talk about it if you like. Massage is for knowing your body good and accepting it. Relaxing and letting go is a process of self-awareness and accepting your own body."

"Thanks, I'll take the towel. Maybe if you don't look for a moment."

"Fine."

"Why does it happen?"

"Try not to stay in your head as you receive my massage. To let go means letting go control, and that may mean delight feelings start happening, together with with your genitals. If you feel an orgasm rising, just say so to me as I massage you, and see what happens. You are learning self-acceptance of your body."

"Does that mean you will massage my genitals?"

"I don't do genital work in directly touching your genitals. But I am actually not against your having orgasms as part of your process. Are we clear? Or do you have any questions still?"

"Let's get on with it."

For The Client Who candidly Orgasms

Of course, it is your process that is important, any way it happens. But why not pre-select the massage body-workers you work with?

Simply tell them on the phone, or in someone is better, that you sometimes candidly orgasm and it embarrasses you. Ask that someone you are meeting for the first time, how they might cope such a situation with you. Then make your decision on the spot, saying you will try out a session or not. You are buying the service. It is your right and necessity to feel safe with the someone you work with.

Tell that someone that you feel either safe or unsafe with them. Be honest and straightforward. Reality is best. Reality is healing.

Issue - The Massage Therapist's Responsibility

The bodywork therapist is also responsible for the effects of her rehabilitation with any of her clients. A bodywork therapist should not think of themselves as just giving a good massage. The follow on the client is also their responsibility.

Thus I have counseled therapists on the issue: can you as a therapist cope this behavior on the part of a client and work with it to some resolution?

If you are a real therapist of policy you want to take on challenges and cope every situation. But can you?

Working on the body is often a temptation to be or feel sexual. Relationships have started up in the middle of client and therapist, and All the time will, such is the human condition.

It is leading to keep the therapeutic situation non-sexual, unless you are trained in sexual massage therapy and can custom this form, actually a developing form in Europe and even America, despite repressive attitudes everywhere.

Thus our advice is to keep defining your boundaries as a massage therapist. It will not be just acting out sexuality that you will sometimes be dealing with. Other clients may be more into anger and you will have to structure your relation to this other great instinct as well.

We have raised some issues here. Instead of giving rigid rules we have explored the issues in terms of their human meaning and trying to be the best massage therapist you can be. You know full well it is more natural than unnatural to face the issues of human sexual feelings and expression inherent to living in a body, your body, and the bodies of your clients.

When faced with unusual or intense situations in your practice, do your best to bring the dynamics into reality.

The Man Who Never Came Back - Some Questions

Remember the man who used spontaneous orgasms to seduce?

Was he then just a seducer, using as his field of available women female massage therapists, some of whom might well be seduced by his genital expression?

He exhibited seductive innuendoes in his conversation.

Or did he naturally get the point that maybe he could get over his fascination with his own behavior and seek intimacy with a sexual partner he also ate evening meal with, showered with, and slept in bed with.

For in the end much of sexual expression is the expression of the need for bonding and intimacy with an additional one human being. The goal of most massage therapy is not naturally corporeal expression but body-awareness that is relaxing, pleasurable most of the time, and balanced in its expression, sex, sports, sensual expression, caring, anger expression, whatever.

Sexual Expression

Why do we all mostly seek sexual expression?

Ah, you want to know everything, don't you?

So do I!

Right now I am working with the view that at essence we are all seeking sexually to have tremendously intensified sexual experiences to know and to maximize our contact of existing.

We exist but we want to know that directly as contact of existing.

But more on that elsewhere!

Feel free to visit our web sites and explore.

I hope you receive new knowledge about Chair Covers. Where you'll be able to offer use within your everyday life. And just remember, your reaction is passed about Chair Covers.